And now for something completely trivial

An ethics question:

I have had my hair cut three times at a salon here in my new city: the first time was with stylist X, who did a much better job that at the previous salon I'd tried. So I went back, but the second time, stylist X was on maternity leave, and I got a cut from stylist Y instead. The third time, stylist X was back from maternity leave, and I went to her again.

BUT

The second haircut from stylist X was much less satisfactory than the haircut from stylist Y.

Some of you may know how strongly I feel about the importance of a satisfactory haircut.

Should I feel guilty about ditching stylist X for stylist Y? Is it unforgivably gauche to switch from one stylist to another in the same salon, or should I try another salon entirely? And if I go back to stylist Y, and run into stylist X, is it necessary to say something (like, "Gee, there was an opening with stylist Y") or just smile and pretend nothing is happening?

My personal stance is that a good haircut trumps all other considerations, and yet there is this feeling like switching from one stylist to another in the same salon is like dumping someone and then going out with his roommate - awkward and icky!

(I can't get too worked up, mind you, since I am paying these people and can decide to pay whomever I like. I just find it funny that I care at all!)

Comments

[musey_me]

Go with Y. Life is TOO short for bad haircuts. I agree that a satisfactory haircut is essential. I have had numerous bad experiences the most recent of which ended up with me going to New York City to just to have a good haircut (let's see, that's >$200 transportation & another $100 for the cut plus lodging....) Tonight I will be trying a new stylist here in town and hope it's good, if not - off to another person I go.

Like you, though, I care. I run into my Stylist X every once in a while and feel immense guilt that I left her even though the haircuts were adequate but not quite satisfactory. Of course, in your case, you only went to X twice, so you may be able to get away with it without anyone even realizing that you've switched. The other option is to change salons entirely.

[seeker]

I'd feel guilty about ditching stylist X for stylist Y, but I'd still do it. However, so as to avoid stylist X I would call ahead of time and find out what days X doesn't work and try to schedule with Y for that day.

If you were me, you'd go through all of that only to have Y give you horrible cut and then X would walk in and ask out loud "What's up with the horrible cut?". Which actually happened to me. Here's hoping you don't have my luck. :)

[Kris73]

I say go to another salon. Not because of the ethics question, though. If you're paying good money for a good haircut, you go with the stylist that you like best. If you really wanted to stay with that salon, I'd go with Y in a heartbeat. You don't have to explain yourself to X.

But, in your case I'd go to another salon, because even though Y was better than X's second haircut, she clearly wasn't good enough to trump X's first hair cut, which seems to have been very satisfactory. I would ask around and see what else you can find. I mean, it's hair after all, and thus cannot be taken lightly!

[dr. m]

Get another cut from Y, then you've had two trips to each stylist. Consider the whole thing an extended interview. Then choose. I don't think they will take it too personally. It's not much like dating when each stylist has a hundred partners.

[Dr. H]

Do you think Stylists X or Y will remember you or not? I seriously don't know.

I like the idea of extended interviews of each.

[ianqui]

I'm with Dr. M. And I don't think you would owe either of them an explanation, but if they're professional, they won't even ask you.

[Jane]

What Dr. M. said. It's not like you've been going to X for years and years and want to switch to Y. Unless, of course, this is a two-person salon where the only stylists are X and Y....if that's the case, I'd switch salons.

[jo(e)]

I vote for stylist Y. And I don't think you should feel bad about it.

Maybe stylist X is better with other types of hair, or with kids, or with perms, or whatever. I'm sure she's got her own customer base and niche. I don't think you should feel bad because you fit better with stylist Y's customer base.

You can always give a lousy tip and that will give X the satisfaction of hearing Y complain about what a bitch you are and how she wishes you had stayed with X.

[jo(e)]

I vote for stylist Y. And I don't think you should feel bad about it.

Maybe stylist X is better with other types of hair, or with kids, or with perms, or whatever. I'm sure she's got her own customer base and niche. I don't think you should feel bad because you fit better with stylist Y's customer base.

You can always give a lousy tip and that will give X the satisfaction of hearing Y complain about what a bitch you are and how she wishes you had stayed with X.

[Cheeky Prof]

Oy. I'm going through a similar stylist fiasco and can empathize. Go with the person you like the best, who does the best job with your hair. I'm the idiot who, after complaining about my guy for the past year, didn't cancel last week's appointment (even though I wanted to) and now have to start the semester with some really fucking awful bangs, for doG's sake.

So the lesson here is don't be like me. Choose the better stylist!!!

[Psycho Kitty]

I would go with whoever cuts your hair best, but yeah, I'd feel weird about it. Most people I know would...there is some weird vibe that gets going with stylists. Why is that? Very odd. I've known people who have used up every salon in town and won't go back to any of them until the "original" stylists leaves.

[wolfangel]

Well, I got my stylist like this:

I'd been going to the same hairdressers for years. The first person badgered me into layers. Layers can be nice, but not with my hair when it's just above my shoulders. Then layers are hideous. It's pretty cruel to push a 13 year old into a haircut they don't want, anyhow.

So, that was the end of seeing her. Then I saw the guy who cut my mother's hair, but he left the salon to sell gift baskets. So I started seeing the guy who cut my grandmother's hair. He gave me a hairstyle I hated for my sister's bat mitzvah. I didn't know what to say, so I didn't say anythihng, went home and cried. We took me back to the salon (still the same one!) and a different stylist fixed it (and it looked good), though the first guy asked me why I didn't tell him then. I couldn't answer.

I've been seeing her since (she doesn't get the yay-long-hair-chop-it-all-off problem), and -- many years later -- I am finally less embarrassed about the whole bat mitzvah thing and can, you know, chat with the guy without blushing.

See whoever you want. In a decade, you'll be over it. :>

[michelle]

I don't know why but this reminded me of what I went through with OBs. I wanted to change OBs after the delivery of my first and they wouldn't let me switch. Apparently, they had so many patients trying to change over to the female doctors they'd brought into their practice that they had to implement a no-switch policy! So I switched right out entirely.

I know hair and pregnancy isn't exactly the same thing but from the provider standpoint, they're both providing a service with which the consumer should be satisfied and any attempts to force the consumer on a route which compromises their needs is just wrong.

(I think I just wrote one of the most insane things I've ever written but it made me laugh to write it, so I'm going to hit the post button now.)

[Rhonda]

Switch. And when you see X while Y is cutting your hair, just smile, say hello, and pretend nothing is weird--because unless she's one of those really high-strung hair stylists, she's not going to be too pissed off.

[Powerprof]

Make the switch - it's your head!! I'm sure they see this stuff all the time. Regardless, you're the customer and need to be happy with your head

[b.]

Thanks for posting this! When I was "trying out" my current salon I went through something similar and similarly excruciating.

I felt crazy.

Actually, in my case, the added problem was that the woman I liked better, I'd miscalculated her tip. I TOTALLY undertipped. So I was convinced I couldn't go to her any more.

However, I did go to her again, and I've been going to her for 2 years, and I love that. And I always give her a good tip now.

Go with Y. You're allowed to shop around.

[dr sniffly]

After ONE visit to Salon A to see my own Stylist X, I got attitude the next time I showed up, having gone somewhere else in the meantime! Apparently there's an expectation of loyalty after a single encounter :)

My solution to this problem was to go with the stylist I liked better, but to do so on a day when the first stylist doesn't work. I had a friend call and get the first stylist's schedule. Then, when I called, and was asked the inevitable "who have you seen in the past?" question, I just made sure that the first stylist's day off was the only day I was available. I'll probably continue this strategy for a while until I feel I've completely transitioned and am unlikely to be remembered by the first stylist.

Good luck!

[profgrrrrl]

Hrm. I'd go with the stylist who does the best job. You have to walk around with the hair, may as well have it be the best possible hair, right? They're probably used to this. No biggie.